While happiness is a choice (for the most part) — life isn’t always sunshine and rainbows.

Lows happen to all of us.

Sometimes there isn’t even a reason we feel sad, anxious, angry or blah. Blame it on the moon, stars or waking up on the wrong side of the bed.

No matter the reason, it’s good to allow yourself to feel all you’re feeling — and at the same time keep in mind that it’s only a mood or season.

This isn’t the rest of your life.

How you feel in one moment will give way, so there’s no reason to make any life-changing decisions, or take drastic action when you’re feeling down or in a funk.

It’s our birthright to experience emotions and it’s important we allow them. (All of them!) They’re not who we are, they’re what we feel — so there’s no need to judge yourself for them either.  

We’re human and experiencing disappointment, heartbreak, frustration and all of life’s lows is normal. And it’s healthy to allow negative emotions to surface rather than stuff them away.

Many people, including a growing number of doctors, believe repressed emotions affect our physical bodies and contribute to disease (feelings of dis-ease), and are as important to pay attention to as eating right and exercise.

So give yourself permission to feel those negative feelings, just don’t get stuck in them for too long.

The same way you should hang out with your Debbie Downer friend in small doses, it’s always a good idea to choose to shift your focus to something lighter and happier.

In addition to not taking drastic action, I’m learning (and practicing!) to relax into negative feelings and emotions.

I’m noticing the more I allow them, not judge myself, and stay in awareness that all I’m experiencing is an unwanted emotion or feeling, the quicker they give way to better ones.

There’s a fantastic poem by Rumi, “The Guest House,” which sums up perfectly how we should invite each emotion into our lives like a guest into our home.

Be grateful for their visit and recognize they’re here for a reason. He says. Entertain and talk to them. Get to know them, listen and learn why they’ve come into your life.

The Guest House

This being human is a guesthouse.

Every morning a new arrival.

A joy, a depression, a meanness,

some momentary awareness comes

As an unexpected visitor.

Welcome and entertain them all!

Even if they’re a crowd of sorrows,

who violently sweep your house

empty of its furniture,

still treat each guest honorably.

He may be clearing you out

for some new delight.

The dark thought, the shame, the malice,

meet them at the door laughing,

and invite them in.

Be grateful for whoever comes,

because each has been sent

as a guide from beyond.

– Rumi

Ride your moods and own your emotions. Like Rumi says, welcome them like a guest into your home, get to know, listen and learn from them.

And then when the time is right … kindly bid them goodnight.

With love,


We’re All Works in Progress

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How to Move Through Criticism